Perfectly Imperfect Mom

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life | The Story of Our Girls

The Story of Our Girls: Traveling to California

January 19, 2017

If you are just reading The Story of Our Girls you might want to go HERE to catch up.

 
After announcing we were having two babies, one by adoption and one through pregnancy we had a lot to get done. Ashlyn was due in less than a month. We still had to complete our home study which is a very in depth process, book our flights, hotels and car for the trip, find someone to watch Ace for an undetermined amount of time and tie up any loose ends here. To say it was overwhelming was an understatement. 
As the month went on we met with our social worker who was absolutely amazing. She made us feel so comfortable and encouraged. I was very nervous by this home visit because she would be the person determine if we were fit to adopt our baby. I remember the night before making sure our house was super clean, every single fire alarm worked and running to the store to find a fire extinguisher because we had no clue where ours was. 
The home visit ended up feeling like we were talking to a friend. She asked us questions about our families, childhoods, school life, friends, how we met and our relationship. She also asked about our parenting style with Ace and how we discipline him. She really loved Ace which was awesome. Overall she said she thought we were good to go. She just had to finish her report and would rush it since Ashlyn was due very soon. 
Branden’s Mom came down to stay with Ace. I remember the night before our flight I was so overwhelmed. I was worried about my friend who was going to make the biggest decision of her life, I was worried about leaving Ace for so long and I was just scared to take this huge step. It’s something I can’t explain. I remember there was an issue with our friends doctor, who treated her horribly and we didn’t know if we should change our plans and come later. I felt helpless, she felt helpless. We decided to still go and hopefully at her next appointment with a new doctor in that practice we would get answers.
We flew to California and got there I believe around 9 something in the morning. We met up with my friend and we both got to see each other with our big bellies for the first time. We had lunch and hung out for a bit looking at family pictures and talking some more. Later in the day Branden and I checked into our hotel and passed out super early. The time change killed us. 
A couple days into our trip out there I went to her doctor appointment with her. Her new doctor was amazing. He said he understood the situation and decided if she hadn’t gone into labor by her due date he would have them set up an induction date, something the other doctor wouldn’t even consider at all. He said he didn’t think we would make it to induction so that made us all feel better. We headed out and waited for our baby. The next day our other friend flew in and that was the best, all of us together. Poor Branden had to be the odd man out. 
The next two days were weird, I wanted to give my friend space and be with our other friend. I also was feeling very stressed about being away from Ace. I wish I could have enjoyed my time in California before Ashlyn’s birth because we did have a good amount of time we could have been doing more. We did drive out to a pier and see the ocean there but I felt like I was in this anxious state because I didn’t know when Ashlyn would come, I felt super out of control. 
The Thursday before Ashlyn’s birth Branden took me out to a pier and we walked around it was nice to just get out and walk around in the fresh air and do something fun. After the pier though I got extremely emotional and started crying. I missed Ace, who ended up getting sick, I felt so guilty. I even told Branden maybe I should fly back to be with him and take a last minute flight when my friend went into labor. The idea of being there another weekend (induction date was that Monday) without her being born and Ace being home really upset me. I didn’t even sleep that night.
At about 5AM the next morning I get a call from my friend saying her water broke! I literally jumped out of bed and was rushing to get ready despite my friend saying not to feel like I needed to rush because she would need to get checked in and everything. Yeah, I didn’t really listen and was all over the place getting ready. Branden got up and got ready. I remember walking to the elevator and looking at him with a huge smile saying “we are about to have a baby girl!” 

It was one of the most exciting and terrifying moments of my life…
 
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  1. Amazing story! I have two girls close in age, but yours is a fun, exciting story. I love that you adopted your friend's baby – that's super special.

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